Need more nightmare fuel? Babyland Hospital in Cleveland GA is a cringe-inducing toy store camouflaged to look like the inside of an operating room. Why? So attendees can take part in the “live birth” of their adopted Cabbage Patch Kid from the womb of the Cabbage Mother… I sh*t you not.
Creeped out yet? Just wait. The inside of the building, which is actually an abandoned medical facility, is a creepy labyrinth of stuffed dolls and makeshift baby nurseries. Once you make it to the “delivery” room, you take a seat in front of the “Birthing Tree” surrounded by cabbages, each of them crowned with the dismembered heads of babies not yet ripe enough to “be born”. Preemies, if you will.
During the “birthing process”, the lights around the Birthing Tree go dim and strange purple crystals begin to glow in the cabbage patch. Suddenly, an announcer lets the audience know that the Mother Cabbage is fully dilated. After several minutes, a “doctor” appears on set and produces a pair of salad tongs that he then uses to pull the doll baby from it’s leafy cabbage hole. He then gives the doll a hearty tap on the butt and you go on your merry way with enough nightmare fuel to last a lifetime.
I can’t imagine why you would want to visit this place, but if you’re prepared to spend the next few years explaining to your kids that babies do not, in fact, come from the giant Cabbage Mother, or you just hate sleeping, have at it.